Stress, burnout and fatigue are so common for Mums these days. How many Mums do you know that just feel exhausted, all the time? You’re constantly busy, kids have so many activities these days, and guess who’s organising everyone and getting them there? Uh-huh, that’s you Mama. No wonder you’re exhausted, you do the work of about 5 full-time jobs at once. Think back to when you were a kid. What did you do after school or on the weekend? I played some sport, but after school I caught the bus home and helped with chores and doing my homework while Mum was at work.
So what do you do to change the situation?
It takes time, persistence and bloody hard work to change the inequity at home. Our society is such that we are islands in the stream. Many of us live away from family who could help us out. Or your family all work too, so can’t be there to help out like mothers helped their children in generations past.
Many of you will feel that it isn’t worth the time and effort to try and change things at home. I understand, it’s overwhelming, exhausting and it can impact relationships. So if you can’t change all of the things you need to do (perhaps there’s some you can relegate, delegate or delete), then lets work on you and support and nourish your body to help it cope. If you’d like to read more about boundaries, please check out this blog.
because you’re worth it
There was a time when I felt bad spending money on myself. I thought to be a great Mum I had to put myself last. Sad, right? But I know I’m not alone in thinking like that. I bet most of you reading this blog have been conditioned to think this way. Sometimes we just don’t realise the thought is in the back of our mind until someone mentions it.
When I got really, really sick from burnout and chronic stress, I realised that everyone in our home suffered when I was exhausted, overwhelmed and irritated. Hmmmm. What about in your house? Same deal? When Mama is looked after and her emotional, physical and mental needs are met, everyone thrives. You’re not meant to just survive. You deserve to thrive.
Stress, Burnout, Fatigue & your day
Have you thought about how stress, burnout and fatigue change your day? maybe not, because often the symptoms and side effects are insidious. They creep up on us slowly, and then it feels like they’ve just always been there.
Or, everyone tells you its normal to feel this way. Because you’re a Mum. No, no, no. Feeling like sh*t isn’t normal. Might be really, really common. But it’s definitely not normal just because you’re a Mum.
Have a look at the infographic below and see how many changes you’re noticing in your day from exhaustion.
How Stress, Burnout and Fatigue Changed My Days
When I was at my lowest point (physically, mentally and emotionally) my days looked something like this:
- Alarm goes off at 7am. (There’s no way I can wake on my own!) Feel like I’ve been hit on the head. Brain fog, puffy eyes, sore joints, headache, exhausted. I’m a wreck.
- I’d doze until kids wouldn’t let me anymore. Guess what? Still felt the same, maybe a bit worse even!
- Drag myself out of bed, snap at kids. Make coffee. Drink at least 2 cups.
- No appetite, no breakfast!
- Madly corral everyone in car to go to school. We were late. Again. I’d talk angrily at them about why we were late again. Or command silence. My senses were overloaded already.
- 3 of 4 children dispensed at school. I’d go home and have a sit down and another coffee while I tried to summon the motivation to get on with my chores.
- I’d finally eat brunch. Something high in carbs, like toast with peanut butter. It had to be easy, simple & fast by then as my head was starting to get woozy from coffee and no food.
- I’d feel so tired after eating, that when my youngest would nap, I’d lie down with her too.
- Get up and I might have something else to eat. I’d try to be ‘good’ and make a green smoothie. Maybe try to think about dinner and get it started.
- Pick up kids. We’d all be grouchy and it was best to not talk to each other, really.
- Home from school, they’d watch iPads or TV, so I could flop about trying to muster motivation and energy to get some stuff done. Kids are reluctant to ask me for anything because the answers are always so grouchy.
- Must be around 6pm, because I’m utterly exhausted.
- Oh hang on, it’s 8pm and here’s my second wind! Now I’m getting all the things done while the kids get ready for bed.
- 10pm and I’m still up. Should go to bed, but I’m so awake now. Chatting and chipper with my husband. He’s a tradie, so keen for an early night.
- Husband goes to bed, so I should too. But then I lie there. And lie there. Those coffees and cortisol are catching up with me!
- Around midnight and I finally go to sleep.
- I wake often. Usually around 2am I’ll wake and it takes up to 2 hours to go back to sleep.
Does that sound familiar to you?
I cringe when I read that. It was such a dark time. Sure I have plenty of stress in my life still these days. I mean I work, run 2 businesses with my husband, and home educate our 4 kids. It’s hectic! But these days I can protect and nourish my body to help reduce the impact to me long-term. Yes, I’ll feel myself getting a little crabby, maybe my shoulders start becoming ear muffs again. I feel tense, a bit foggy headed. But I recognise them for what they are, and implement my herbal, nutritional, food and lifestyle routines and rituals to help reduce the symptoms.
Symptoms are messages from our body that help you understand where there is imbalance or dysfunction that needs support. Once you feel and acknowledge them, you can implement what works for you to reduce the load on your body. If you’d like to do a quiz to find out what messages (symptoms) your body is sending, then read this blog.
Here’s 5 things you can do right now, for $0, to boost your energy. I’ll be sharing 5 more of my best tips to boost energy and beat burnout in a webinar on 20th February 2020. Tickets are only $5, with all proceeds going to PartnerSPEAK.org.au. You can find out more and reserve your spot here.
my life changed with the support of a naturopath.
I discovered the importance of self-care:
- What we eat,
- The products we use (on our body & in our home)
- How we move our bodies, and
- How we cope with stress,
for our physical & mental health.
And I said goodbye to:
- Losing it with my love ones.
- Feeling cranky, irritated and annoyed.
- That 3pm energy slump.
- Brain fog, forgetfulness and poor concentration.
- Restless, unrefreshing sleep.
- Dragging myself out of bed in the morning.
- Feeling like a zombie, and walking through mud each day.
I want to share what I’ve learned with other Mums like you. So you don’t have to go through what I’ve been through.
How I can help you find out what works for you
If you’d like to take a more personal approach, or would like more structure and support in reclaiming your health, I’m available online and in clinic. This is what I do in clinic with my 1:1 clients and through my 4-week online program, Energy Everyday. I love giving my clients bite-sized, easily digestible chunks of information and advice that helps them understand their body and how to support it. Because knowledge is power, I’m very passionate about providing accessible information.
Remember, motherhood isn’t something that you just have to survive. You can thrive. Things can change with the right support by your side.
When Mum thrives, the rest of the family does too
Next round of the program starts 29th February 2020. Find out more about the program here. Early Bird is open now, until 11.55pm AEDT, 23rd February 2020. I’d love to help you understand your body, repair it and restore your health and energy.